Meghan Markle must be livid right now. Jennifer Garner, America's sweetheart and the epitome of the girl-next-door charm, has just launched a Cameo account to raise funds for California wildfire relief. And you can bet Meghan is already scrambling to replicate her latest move.
It seems impossible for Meghan to let another woman—especially one who is universally adored—have a moment in the spotlight without trying to shove her way in. This week, Jennifer Garner made her debut on Cameo, offering personalized video messages for $600, with all proceeds directed toward wildfire relief efforts. Unlike Meghan, who built her brand around the idea of compassion and service, Jennifer is actually using her celebrity status for tangible good. Meanwhile, Meghan, who often preaches about kindness and charity, hasn’t even considered doing the same—yet.
Give her a few days, and she’ll probably have her PR team brainstorming ways to one-up Jennifer’s initiative. The real question is: how much would Meghan charge? Let’s not forget, this is the same woman who reportedly demanded a staggering $1 million per Instagram post and secured a lucrative Netflix deal for, well, whatever it is she actually does.
If Meghan ever decided to join Cameo, you can already imagine how it would go. Each request would be less about the recipient and more about Meghan herself. A simple birthday shout-out would somehow morph into a monologue about her struggles, her victimhood, and how misunderstood she is. “Happy birthday, Lisa! I just wanted to take a moment to reflect on my own journey—it’s been so hard, you know. The British press was unbelievably cruel to me. Anyway, hope you have a great day!” The refund requests would be endless.
But Meghan’s connection to Jennifer Garner doesn’t end there. Lately, she’s been subtly mirroring Jennifer’s persona. Think about it—Jennifer is widely recognized as a hands-on mom who prioritizes her children, loves to cook, and often appears in cozy sweaters while running errands. Sound familiar? Meghan has recently been pushing the same relatable-mom aesthetic, conveniently ignoring the fact that, for years, she distanced herself from anything remotely domestic, insisting she was too royal for such everyday tasks.
Jennifer Garner’s popularity only grew during her separation and divorce from Ben Affleck, especially as she navigated his very public struggles with addiction. She handled the ordeal with grace, never painting herself as a victim, which only deepened public admiration. And now, here comes Meghan, seemingly trapped in a deteriorating marriage with Prince Harry, attempting to pivot into the wholesome American mom role—just as Jennifer did. The issue? Jennifer’s warmth and authenticity come naturally, while Meghan’s image always feels carefully curated in a PR boardroom.
And then there's the matter of charity work. Jennifer Garner has been deeply involved with Save the Children for years, not just showing up for photo ops but putting in real effort. Meghan, on the other hand, managed a single book reading for Archie’s first birthday and seemed to expect endless praise. The stark difference in their approach is impossible to ignore.
Ultimately, Meghan’s attempts at reinvention never seem to stick. She wants Jennifer Garner’s wholesome appeal but lacks the sincerity to pull it off. Jennifer was raised in a loving, grounded family and built a successful career long before she was linked to a famous man. Meghan? Not so much. She craves Jennifer’s level of respect and admiration but approaches it with the work ethic of a reality TV star—minus the self-awareness.
So, how long before Meghan Markle jumps on Cameo? Place your bets now. Just don’t expect the proceeds to go to wildfire relief—unless, of course, there’s a way to funnel them through Archewell first. Grifting is an art, after all.
